Subject: Stupid _TV_Guide_ Article
From: jym@remarque.berkeley.edu (Jym Dyer)
Date: 1990-09-09, 00:56
Newsgroups: alt.tv.twin-peaks

(Words are deleted because they are spoilers.  They are footnoted
    at the end of the article, after a formfeed.  You have been
    warned.)
.-.
|Y|ou might have seen the latest _TV_Guide_ with "the women of
`-' _Twin_Peaks_" on the cover ("Laura," "Norma," and "Donna").
    The _Twin_Peaks_ article inside was absolutely worthless.
.-.
|T|hey asked a number of real (TM) writers who they think killed
`-' Laura Palmer---or, rather, who they (as real (TM) writers)
    would have be the killer.
.-.
|T|he responses were uniformly stupid.  One was so dumb she made
`-' Audrey the person who ____[1] Agent Cooper in the last scene
    of the final season episode, because he turned her down.
    Never mind that he's been nicer to her than anyone else has,
    not to mention that she's busy meeting with ___ ___[2].
.-.
|I|t was this same writer who said she would prefer to watch
`-' _Knot's_Landing_ to _Twin_Peaks_.  How vapid.  How so much
    like _TV_Guide_.  Don't bother buying the issue.
    <_Jym_>

[1] "shot"
[2] "her dad"