Season 2, Episode 12: The Black Widow — January 12–18, 1991

In article <1991Jan17.183942.9570@nntp-server.caltech.edu> floom@nntp-server.caltech.edu (Laura E. Floom) writes:
> >In article <cfiM01CE096100@amdahl.uts.amdahl.com> krs@amdahl.uts.amdahl.com (Kris Stephens [Hail Eris!]) writes:
>> >>The most common domino-sets are called Double-Sixes, with tiles 
>> >>running from blank-blank through six-six.  For real fanatics,
>> >>there are Double-Nines, and if players have fallen off the deep
>> >>end, Double-Twelves (blank-blank through twelve-twelve).
> >
> >Do you think Hank ever walked around with a blank-blank tile. Prehaps
> >it was given to him as a child?

Got me there.  *If* the number of spots on the dominos is Hank
counting kills (or something else), he might've started with a
blank-blank.  On the other hand, he might've started with the
blank-one after his first event.  Was his attachment to dominoes
started as an infant?  No answer available and virtually any
theory plausible.

...Kris
-- Kristopher Stephens, | (408-746-6047) | krs@uts.amdahl.com | KC6DFS Amdahl Corporation | | | [The opinions expressed above are mine, solely, and do not ] [necessarily reflect the opinions or policies of Amdahl Corp. ]

In article <91016.085659ADMN8647@Ryerson.CA> ADMN8647@Ryerson.CA (Linda Birmingham) writes:
> >
> >I too, feel there is more likely a connection between the KKK (shouldn't
> >that be CCK?) and Little Nicky than Nicky being Bob's next host.
> >Didn't Mrs. Tremond say that her grandson was an orphan?
> >
> >Linda

But . . . does _that_ Mrs. Tremond (the bedridden one who had the grandson)
really exist, or who is she really.  Remember that when Donna went back to the
Tremond house with Coop and Andy they found only a "middle-aged" Mrs. Tremond,
whom Donna had never seen before, who said her mother had died years before and
said she had no children.  Another unsolved tidbit!

-- ====================================================================== | Germaine A. L'Eveque germaine@cs.columbia.edu (212) 854-8112 | | Academic Records Administrator, Computer Science Department | | Columbia University, 450-D Com.Sci.Bldg., New York, NY 10027 |

ekushnir@math.lsa.umich.edu (Eugene Kushnirsky) writes:

> >Okay, let me try one last time to explain why I think Ben Horne's character is
> >being ruined. He was such a great villain, at first; scheming, ruthless, 
> >always
> >in control. He had half the town in his pocket and goons like Hank Jennings on
> >a short leash. Now he's walking around in his bathrobe, making wild eyes at 
> >Bobby Briggs and the camera. 

This is, within acceptable limits, true.

> >And I think the reason for this is the void left
> >by Leland's death and the disappearance of Jacoby and the Log Lady, a need for
> >a "wacky" character. I think that Ben's soldiers are meant to take the place 
> >of Leland's dancing and to save the writers some work. 

This, however, is very debatable.  I, for one, think that Ben's breakdown is
reasonably understandable given everything he's lost of late.  If you'd
suddenly lost most/all of your means to control *anybody*, you might well
hang around in your bathrobe 24 hours a day too.

> >You found Ben's transformation "draining"? This wasn't exactly a case study of
> >mental degeneration. 

True.

> >This was a once-great TV show trying for some laughs.

Debatable, and NOT true IMHO.  TP has definitely tried for laughs in places
(e.g. Nadine for certain)--but I don't think Ben is one of said places.

> >Look, I'm not a psychiatrist and I don't think that you are either (If I'm 
> >wrong, please correct me). 

You're quite right.

> >But I think that Ben is to mental breakdowns as 
> >Nadine is to comas. The principal difference being that what was happening to
> >Nadine used to be funny.

I'm not sure we've got much in the way of common ground here, since I see
very, very few similarities between the evolutions of the two characters.
Ben, whom you herald so much as a "great villain" who's now being ruined, is
having to deal with the collapse of everything he knows.  I have a hunch, 
though, that he'll be back in the saddle eventually, and cannier than
before.

Tim Lynch

I just had an awful thought!  I've been watching the around the clock
coverage on that war thing over in Iran and Jordan all afternoon, and
I came to the sudden realization that they were pre-empting programs
for it!  What if the war is not over by Saturday?  Do you think they'll
pre-empt Twin Peaks, or will they realize that Twin Peaks is more
important than a little squabble over oil?  I'm real worried.

The Coop-man, coming to you live from UCSC
"Thus spake the Master Detective"

In article <appetite-satisfaction-a-golden-circle-0x22fc> cooper@ucscb.ucsc.edu (Agent Dale Cooper) writes:
> >I just had an awful thought!  I've been watching the around the clock
> >coverage on that war thing over in Iran and Jordan all afternoon, and
> >I came to the sudden realization that they were pre-empting programs
> >for it!  What if the war is not over by Saturday?  Do you think they'll
> >pre-empt Twin Peaks, or will they realize that Twin Peaks is more
> >important than a little squabble over oil?  I'm real worried.
> >
> >The Coop-man, coming to you live from UCSC
> >"Thus spake the Master Detective"
  ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Huh? Do you know Tess VB?

David Van Beveren                           INTERNET: emisle!dvb@ism.isc.com
EIS ltd. Professional Software Services     UUCP:   ..uunet!emisle!dvb
voice: (818) 587-1247

In article <1991Jan14.204818.12017@watserv1.waterloo.edu> alternat@watserv1.waterloo.edu (Ann Hodgins) writes:
> >I've been trying to figure out why some people think that
> >Lynch's work, Twin Peaks in particular, is sexist.

We may never figure out how and why people think :-) but we can
at least investigate whether Twin Peaks is in fact sexist.

> >Male characters predominate, but that is fair enough I think for
> >a cop show with a 50's feel.  

What this overlooks it that it is a CHOICE on the creators' part to go
for that "50's feel," including any potentially sexist subtext.

The inescapable fact is that almost everything in TWIN PEAKS reinforces
traditional sex roles and attitudes.  The girls may skulk around at
night hunting for clues, but when the school bell rings they're demure
bobbysoxers gushing over cute guys once again.  Tough, laconic men tote
the guns, ride the Harleys, pump the gas and fix the engines.  Strong
women are scheming bitches.  Bad women are slit-skirted hussies.
Mothers are mostly submissive housewives if they're not actually
drugged, crippled, zombied or worse.  Women kill with sex! but are
themselves raped, beaten and tortured to death, while the men mostly go
out in a blaze of gunfire or flashing knives.  

And so forth.  I don't think most of it is very much different from what
we get on the rest of TV, mind you.  The question "Is TP sexist" should
be backed up with the larger question "Is TV is general sexist?"  Why do
we expect Lynch and Frost to do significantly better than, say,
MacGyver?  Because this is our most favoritest show in the whole world?

-- "The thought of being President frightens me and I @-@ Tom Neff do not think I want the job." -- Ronald Reagan, 1973 \_/ tneff@bfmny0.BFM.COM

This is the official CALL FOR DISCUSSION for a new newsgroup, 

rec.arts.tv.desert-shield.

The group has now been in existance for nearly half a year, and is one of
the top 3 news groups in overall postings (trailing only rec.arts.startrek
and alt.sex in today's article account).  This group is as long lived as
Twin Peaks was when the oh-so-close vote failed.  We need to move it to
the rec hierarchy where it can get better propogation.

Rec.arts.tv is the correct hierarchy for this COOL(tm) newsgroup
because showing the war on tv is truly an art.  I find some of
the visual's, such as the missiles heading in to Iraq more stunning 
that some of the best moments in Twin Peaks.  I wasn't even
upset that the Flash was pre-empted this evening, although I hear
he was going to fight the two-headed giant racoon from Mars, which
would have been real neat.  The missiles were neater though.

Phillip Edward Nunez
--
I'll be releasing the already complete owlspeak version 2.0 real soon
now.  (Owlspeak (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved)
Based upon recent events, I am now writing Propaganda speak.  Watch for
it.  (Propagandaspeak (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved)
Copyright Statement (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved

This is a correctional post.  In the article I sent a few minutes ago, my
Organization: field was garbled.  I deeply apologize for this error.

Phillip "Edward" Nunez
--
I'll be releasing the already complete owlspeak version 2.0 real soon
now.  (Owlspeak (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved)
Based upon recent events, I am now writing Propaganda speak.  Watch for
it.  (Propagandaspeak (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved)
Copyright Statement (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved
--
I'll be releasing the already complete owlspeak version 2.0 real soon
now.  (Owlspeak (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved)
Based upon recent events, I am now writing Propaganda speak.  Watch for
it.  (Propagandaspeak (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved)
Copyright Statement (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved

what did BOB mean, that Cooper was attacked in Chicago
what happened
does Cooper have BOB in him???
remember when BOB was finally arrested he mentioned to Coop
that something will hapen
could any of you plese tell me your oppinion???
thanks in advance

alex
shinkaryov

axs9017@tesla.njit.edu

In article <91015.132110ACPS7035@Ryerson.CA>, ACPS7035@Ryerson.CA (Sean Edward Blenkhorn) writes:
> >The ideas that a group of friends and I came up with is that Diane is the
> >woman that Cooper fell in love with and he was suppose to protect.  When she
> >was killed he snapped and goes around with the pocket recorder talking to
> >Diane.

I like it!

It is more than likely that Twin Peaks will be pre-empted by news of
the war like everything else has.  I can live without all of it except
for football and Twin Peaks.  You'd think they'd give us a bit of a
break from all that depressing news.

And to the poster before this who thinks missiles are neat.  It is
NOT neat, it's terrifying.  How well do you know BOB?

--Cool Bean
-- **This is not cultural. **Bo Don't Know Snow.

kjohnson@hpcuhc.cup.hp.com (Keith Johnson) writes:

> >additional domino theory:

> >1. domino sets can be of at least 9 X 9 size.

> >2. with the use of a most significant domino-end, Hank
> >   could count to 6*6 or 9*9 before he ran out of
> >   domino.
    ^^^^^^ don't you mean 'domini'?

hank could also manufacture his own domini.  and further, it's assumed that
he's counting in decimal.
-- @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ don't just prophesy =- ............................... @@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ the end, get out ----- : tpehrson@javelin.sim.es.com : @@ + @ + @ + @ a a @@ there and =-------=-== :.............................: @@aaa@aaa@aaa@a@@@a@@ participate! ===----=--klaligrillnges+subgooascmahlcut

In article <1991Jan14.203514.22341@engin.umich.edu> ewm@caen.engin.umich.edu (Ernst W Mayer) writes:
> >I was catching up on movies over the holidays, and I saw something which
> >may explain who "Diane" is, or at least where the idea may have come from.
> >In the Rob Reiner - directed movie "Say Anything", Lloyd Dobler (John Cusack)
> >is in love with the high school valedictorian, Diane Cort (I forgot who played
> >Diane.) After she breaks up with him (and gives him a ball point pen, to
> >assuage his impending grief,) he starts driving around in his car at all hours
> >and recording his thoughts on a small, hand - held tape recorder. If I recall
> >correctly, he starts one of these "conversations" off by saying "Diane,...".
> >Recall that the first reference to "Diane" in TP is a shot of Cooper in his
> >car, about to enter Twin Peaks, speaking into his tape recorder.
> >This of course does not explain who "Diane" in TP is, or if she even exists,
> >just my $.02 worth.

Well, I can't comment on the link, but I can say a few things on this,
firstly - Rob Reiner did not direct 'Say Anything', you are probably thinking
of 'The Sure Thing' (I say this because it was a similar *sort* of film with
John Cusack, but IMO much bettert).  Also, the girl in 'Say Anything' was
Ione Skye (Love that overbite, holy cow), who was also in 'River's Edge'.
The girl in Sure Thing was Daphne Zuniga.

vik

--
" Ooooh .... Big Woo "
Suzanne Sugarbaker upon shooting Anthony Bouvier

In article <18979@shlump.nac.dec.com> boyajian@ruby.dec.com writes:
> >In article <62082@bbn.BBN.COM>, sminkin@bbn.com (Scott Minkin) writes...
> >} Did anyone but me notice that the audio for the voice dropped out at
> >} several different points during this TP?
> >People in this newsgroup from other parts of the country have made the
> >same observation about previous episodes, but this is the first time that
> >it's occurred on WCVB.
> >It apparently has something to with the surround sound encoding (or more
> >properly, decoding) on the local affiliate's end.

Hmmmm... Are you sure?  I noticed the glitch on my Boston-area TV.  The
glitch seemed to affect the VOCAL track only, and left the MUSIC and
SOUND EFFECT track intact.
--
 Daniel Pearl      Concurrent Computer Corporation, Westford, Massachusetts USA
(508) 392-2478          danny@westford.ccur.com

In article <42522@ut-emx.uucp>, osmigo@ut-emx.uucp (Ron Morgan) writes:
> > in intensity to that of the "trekkies" and their devotion to Star Trek. I
> > wonder, thinking of "trekkies," what's a good handle for Twin Peaks fans?
> > "Peakies"? "Twinkies"?


 In my part of the woods, we call ourselves 'peakers'


 I like it!


Sam

In article <1991Jan18.005441.22418@nntp-server.caltech.edu> tlynch@nntp-server.caltech.edu (Timothy W. Lynch) writes:
> >ekushnir@math.lsa.umich.edu (Eugene Kushnirsky) writes:
> >
>> >>Okay, let me try one last time to explain why I think Ben Horne's character is
>> >>being ruined. He was such a great villain, at first; scheming, ruthless, 
>> >>always
>> >>in control. He had half the town in his pocket and goons like Hank Jennings on
>> >>a short leash. Now he's walking around in his bathrobe, making wild eyes at 
>> >>Bobby Briggs and the camera. 
> >
Well, it's hard for me to get my head around the concept of a "great villian"
since to me that is a contradition in terms.  I saw Ben as a man with a hard
exo-skeleton, like a hornet, who was soft and weak inside. His
inner life was a mess.  Now it seems that he is trying to develop some
real backbone, built on his childhood strengths, that will allow him to be
softer and more vulnerable on the surface, while still strong.
 
But despite what I have just said, there is a way in which I can sympathize
with your argument.  I can't find the words to express it, but when I grow
fond of an 'anti-social ' character I feel a sense of loss when
they die or 'go straight'.
 
a.h.

In article <87707001@bfmny0.BFM.COM> tneff@bfmny0.BFM.COM (Tom Neff) writes:
> >In article <1991Jan14.204818.12017@watserv1.waterloo.edu> alternat@watserv1.waterloo.edu (Ann Hodgins) writes:
>> >>I've been trying to figure out why some people think that
>> >>Lynch's work, Twin Peaks in particular, is sexist.
> >
>> >>Male characters predominate, but that is fair enough I think for
>> >>a cop show with a 50's feel.  
> >
                      Response:

> >What this overlooks it that it is a CHOICE on the creators' part to go
> >for that "50's feel," including any potentially sexist subtext.
> >
> >The inescapable fact is that almost everything in TWIN PEAKS reinforces
> >traditional sex roles and attitudes.  The girls may skulk around at
> >night hunting for clues, but when the school bell rings they're demure
> >bobbysoxers gushing over cute guys once again.  Tough, laconic men tote
> >the guns, ride the Harleys, pump the gas and fix the engines.  Strong
> >women are scheming bitches.  Bad women are slit-skirted hussies.
> >Mothers are mostly submissive housewives if they're not actually
> >drugged, crippled, zombied or worse.  Women kill with sex! but are
> >themselves raped, beaten and tortured to death, while the men mostly go
> >out in a blaze of gunfire or flashing knives.  
> >
            This response was so good I decided to include the entire
thing with my reply which is that many people in my life have
argued that TP is sexist but this is the first time the argument has been
made strongly enough to make me reconsider.  I'm still not convinced
that TP is sexist but I have some thinking to do.
 
a.h.

I sure hope that the war in the gulf is over before Saturday.
The war reportage reminds me of sports reporting. All I want
is periodic updates not a blow by blow.  Last night
I had to endure endless repetition of the same info while
my favourite shows were pre-empted (ENG and LA Law). 
No civilain can do anything to influence events in the gulf so why
do we have to be so over-informed about it?

In article <00942CD6.87B6BA60@pip.cc.brandeis.edu> st883045@pip.cc.brandeis.edu writes:
%Did anyone out there notice that when the teaser for next week's episode
%was showing, one of the pieces of Ben Horne's Gettysburg diorama was shown.
%The piece was a soldier on a ****WHITE HORSE**** Remember the white horse 
%the last time BOB appeared???? This is just my theory, and I have been 
%proven wrong before, I just want my say.
%------------------------------------------------------------------------------  -----Jason Bilsky                     ! "Seven schools in seven states                                                !  and the only thing different                                                 !  is my locker combination."           --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In article </X234/B491/THE/OWLS/ARE/NOT/WHAT/THEY/SEEM/N005/C001@soda> phillip@soda.berkeley.edu (Phillip "Edward" Nunez) writes:

   Organization: TinyMUCH Development Team (Wanna join? Mail to phillip@soda!)
   Lines: 16

   This is a correctional post.  In the article I sent a few minutes ago, my
   Organization: field was garbled.  I deeply apologize for this error.

   Phillip "Edward" Nunez
   --
   I'll be releasing the already complete owlspeak version 2.0 real soon
   now.  (Owlspeak (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved)
   Based upon recent events, I am now writing Propaganda speak.  Watch for
   it.  (Propagandaspeak (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved)
   Copyright Statement (c) 1991 Phillip Edward Nunez all rights reserved

  [double signature]

For all those who don't get the (rather lame) joke--TinyMUCH is a MUD
that a few people around the country keep insisting that they're
working on.  It's all a hoax (God, I hope it's a hoax), including
rather ridiculous features which I'm not going to explain to
non-MUDders, because you would stare at me as if I'm crazy, which I
am, and you can't see me anyway so I don't know why I'd care.

Wonder how many "What's a MUD?" replies I'll get?

--
/=============================================================================\
| Francis Stracke| My opinions are my own.  I don't steal them.|
| Department of Mathematics|=============================================|
| University of Chicago| Until you stalk and overrun,           |
| francis@zaphod.uchicago.edu|  you can't devour anyone. -- Hobbes       |
\=============================================================================/

Don't know about you, Cool Bean, but I sure smelled satire in the posting
about "rec.tv.arts.desert-storm"!  Explosions would be fun to watch if
they didn't kill people or wreck anything -- that's why war is terrifying
but fireworks are fun!  

Let's file the whole thing under "rec.humor.gallows"!
--
Julie Kozaczka Stahlhut
"I'm not especially responsible but it's not my employer's fault."

In article <1991Jan18.135629.25689@mailer.cc.fsu.edu>  writes:
> >In article <1991Jan18.174426.4267@watserv1.waterloo.edu>, alternat@watserv1.waterloo.edu (Ann Hodgins) writes...
>> >>I sure hope that the war in the gulf is over before Saturday.
>> >>The war reportage reminds me of sports reporting. All I want
>> >>is periodic updates not a blow by blow.  Last night
>> >>I had to endure endless repetition of the same info while
>> >>my favourite shows were pre-empted (ENG and LA Law). 
>> >>No civilain can do anything to influence events in the gulf so why
>> >>do we have to be so over-informed about it?
>> >> 
> >
> >I must say, quite frankly, that I can't understand this line of argument.
> >You *had* to endure mindless repetition of the same info? You could have read
> >a book or something, no? I think it's kind of sad that people people get upset
> >when their fictional dramas get pre-empted by real life events.  In case you
> >missed it, there were a nerve-wracking couple of hours last night when it 
> >appeared that Israel may have been attacked by missiles with nerve gas warheads.
> >This would clearly have had *enormous* consequences, and the reporting gradually
> >developed from confused doubt to relieved relative certainty over a period of
> >about three hours.  Mesmerizing and hardly the endless repetition of the same
> >info.  There are also many citizens of the US with relatives involved in the 
> >Persian Gulf events and I think that it's the *duty* of the networks to provide
> >those interested parties with continuous coverage.  No matter what your feelings
> >may be concerning the rightness of the war, I think, as a citizen of the world,
> >you should be interested in it.  I think that sitting around saying, "Damn this
> >war - Twin Peaks is pre-empted again!" while people on both sides are fighting
> >and dying is *incredibly* shallow and self-centered.



Sure, I know that Israel was teetering on the brink of retaliation
and I did wanted to know, * on the hour or half hour*, what would happen.
But I did not need to hear "We have an unconfirmed report, no that's wrong,
no it's right, well its dark and we don't really know" for hours while 
something of some value to me was beng pre-empted. 

At the same time, a woman I know was in 36 hour labour. I wanted to know
what would happen there too, but I did not want to hear about every contraction.
Thousands of women are having babies around the world. I care, but I also
want to watch my favourite shows. There is a limit to how much detail I want
to know about events that are completely beyond my control and have no
immediate effect on myself and my loved ones. If you can't understand
that I suggest that you are thick.

> > is it common for a male heterosexual transvestite to use
> > campy gestures?
___
__  Denise seems to be revelling in femininity, not full-blown
_   camp (which is in part a parody of femininity).  Of course,
    Denise is also aware of the irony involved.
___
__  I think the femininity was used with great effect on Ernie.
_   <_Jym_>

:::.-----.::: Jym Dyer :::::: jym@mica.berkeley.edu :::.______.:::
::/  o o  \::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::| Damn |\::
::\ \___/ /:: I put my panties on one leg at a time. ::| Fine |/::
:::`-----':::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::`------':::

WARNING: This is not directly related to twin peaks; follow-ups will go to
alt.desert-shield. 

In article <1991Jan18.174426.4267@watserv1.waterloo.edu>,
> >alternat@watserv1.waterloo.edu (Ann Hodgins) writes... 

> >I sure hope that the war in the gulf is over before Saturday.

So do I, but for apparently different reasons.

> >The war reportage reminds me of sports reporting. All I want
> >is periodic updates not a blow by blow.  Last night
> >I had to endure endless repetition of the same info while
> >my favourite shows were pre-empted (ENG and LA Law). 
> >No civilain can do anything to influence events in the gulf so why
> >do we have to be so over-informed about it?

Well, an educated populace is a more responsible populace.  Besides, "periodic
updates" only work in cut-and-dried events like football games; you KNOW when
the team's scored a touchdown, while you can't be certain if SCUDs actually hit
Tel Aviv. Thus, it's more difficult for newscasters to give a clean summary of
the goings-on. In addition, world events as they occur on-the-fly is much more
exciting to watch than any kind of fiction.  I think that the TV ratings reports
support the notion that most Americans are more interested in the war than in
prime-time television.  

I don't agree that the average citizen can do nothing about the war.  Average
citizens certainly had an effect on the Vietnam War, and I don't think they were
protesting because "Mod Squad" had been pre-empted. :-)

I don't mean to sound obnoxious, but I do feel that Americans in general are
extraordinarily apathetic (just look at our voting percentages), so this touches
a nerve with me.  To concede, I'll be upset if TP gets pre-empted, but I'll 
certainly stay tuned to see why.

Personally, I feel the war is much more important to keep an eye on.  We can 
always see TP at a later date when are loved ones are home safe.  

******************************************************************************
Mike Cluff*   One who knows does not post;
v22964qs@ubvms or mike%luick@ubvms*       One who posts does not know.
UB Language Perception Laboratory*         (apologies to Lao Tzu)
******************************************************************************

What ever happened to Ben's brother, Jerry. I love their ice cream eating
scene (Ben and Jerry). And also the flashlight dance.

In article <FRANCIS.91Jan18110630@daisy.uchicago.edu> francis@uchicago.edu (Francis Stracke) writes:
> >For all those who don't get the (rather lame) joke--TinyMUCH is a MUD
> >that a few people around the country keep insisting that they're
> >working on.  It's all a hoax (God, I hope it's a hoax), including
 
Are you sure it's a hoax?  I've actually seen something else that Phillip
wrote, the Owlspeak program that he mentioned in his posting.  It was
kind of cute.  So, if he wrote that one...

In article <1991Jan18.135629.25689@mailer.cc.fsu.edu>  writes:
> >There are also many citizens of the US with relatives involved in the 
> >Persian Gulf events and I think that it's the *duty* of the networks to provide
> >those interested parties with continuous coverage.  No matter what your feelings
> >may be concerning the rightness of the war, I think, as a citizen of the world,
> >you should be interested in it.  I think that sitting around saying, "Damn this
> >war - Twin Peaks is pre-empted again!" while people on both sides are fighting
> >and dying is *incredibly* shallow and self-centered.

...and wallowing in it isn't shallow?  I'm interested in hearing about
what's happening in the war.  I'm not interested in hearing Dan Rather
speculate about what's happening only to be corrected a half-hour later.
It doesn't help to report to viewers that their friends and families
have been (confirmed!) hit with nerve gas when in fact there was no 
nerve gas.  That is downright irresponsible.  I personally won't be 
upset if Twin Peaks is pre-empted by news coverage of the war, but if 
the networks have to find ways to fill up air time between bursts of 
*real* information then why not air the regular programs with interruptions 
as they are required?  Let the news channels handle the filler (i.e.
anyone who can find Iraq on a map being interview as a mideast expert).

-- Scott Amspoker | Basis International, Albuquerque, NM | This space available (505) 345-5232 | unmvax.cs.unm.edu!bbx!bbxsda!scott |

In article <1991Jan18.181719.4341@athena.mit.edu> jstahlhu@athena.mit.edu (Julie Kozaczka Stahlhut) writes:
> >Don't know about you, Cool Bean, but I sure smelled satire in the posting
 
Satire?  What's satire?  Is that like when you forget the little smiley
faces?

Phillip

In article <18979@shlump.nac.dec.com>, boyajian@ruby.dec.com (Cisco's
Buddy) writes:
> > In article <62082@bbn.BBN.COM>, sminkin@bbn.com (Scott Minkin)
writes...
> > 
> > } Did anyone but me notice that the audio for the voice dropped out
at
> > } several different points during this TP?
> > 
> > People in this newsgroup from other parts of the country have made
the
> > same observation about previous episodes, but this is the first time
that
> > it's occurred on WCVB.
> > 
> > It apparently has something to with the surround sound encoding (or
more
> > properly, decoding) on the local affiliate's end.

Dolby Surround Sound needs no decoding by the TV station. The decoding
is done by your
ears! Surround  Sound plays with the mix of Left + Right and Left -
Right. All the audio
should  have been handled by the TV production company, maybe THEY
screwed up.

The following program may be of vast interest to many of you out there.
It was written by me.  It is the second version, the eagerly-awaited
re-release, of the Owlspeak program everyone was so extatic about!

It is a filter program, much like the rather infamous 'jive'.

  How to make the program:
  -----------------------

Save this article to disk, and then delete all of the lines up to (and
including) the "CUT HERE" line.  Then you need to compile it.  For the
examples below, the filename is "owlspeak.c".

If you are using the Nunez C Compiler, simply enter the command line:

Phillip [17]:  philcc -cool owlspeak.c -o owlspeak

If you are using something like gcc, you should type something like:

  gcc owlspeak.c -o owlspeak -O -Dphillip

But if you don't compile it with philcc, it won't be as good.  And in any
case, you need a compiler able to grok ANSI C.

Run the program by piping operations through it.  For example, to read
the message of the day, use "cat /etc/motd | owlspeak".

Have some fun.  Pipe your friend's .forward through owlspeak.  Rlogin to
your favorite machine through owlspeak.  The possibilities are endless.

Send all bug reports, comments, and suggestions to phillip@soda.berkeley.edu.

---------- CUT HERE ---------
/* Owlspeak, by Phillip "Edward" Nunez (phillip@soda.berkeley.edu) */

static char *VERSION = "/OWLSPEAK/VERSION/V002/PHILLIP/PHILLIP/PHILLIP\n";

                          /* Phillip in the above refers to phillip@soda,
                             Phillip "Edward" Nunez.                      */

#include <stdio.h>
#include <string.h>
#include <ctype.h>
#include <time.h>

#ifdef X11
  #include <X11/X.h>
#endif                          /* So I can post this to comp.sources.x */

#define USAGE "/USAGE/U000/CAT/FILE/PIPE/OWLSPEAK/OPTION/V/OPTIONAL\n"
#define PUNCT "@#$%^&*()_+|~-=\\`{}[]:\";'<>?,./"
#define MESSINESS 6
#define MAXNUM 01000                    /* In octal, of course */

#define PROBABILITY 9                   /* Chances are 1 in PROBABILITY
                                           (decimal) that a strange message
                                           will appear per random slashed
                                           octal number generated and per
                                           line of text.          */

/*  You might want to nazi the source code since you don't want stupid
        users to know everything that the program might do to their
        messages unless they run it a lot.                              */

char *quotes[] = {
        "/THE/OWLS/ARE/NOT/WHAT/THEY/SEEM",
        "/COOPER/COOPER/COOPER",
        "/DAMN/GOOD/COFFEE",
        "/I/LIKE/WHALES",
        "//APPETITE//SATISFACTION/",
        "/CIRCLE/OF/GOLD",
        "/HUMAN/HOST",
        "/WILL/NOT/BE/WRONG",
        "/SMILING/BAG",
        "/DEATH/BAG",
        "/ANOTHER/PLACE",
        "/THE/BIRDS/SING/A/PRETTY/SONG",
        "/ALWAYS/MUSIC/IN/THE/AIR",
        "/THROUGH/THE/DARKNESS/OF/FUTURE/PAST",
        "/FIRE/WALK/WITH/ME",
        "/WORK/RELATED",
        "/MILK/WILL/GET/COLD/ON/YOU",
        "/HEARD/ABOUT/YOU",
        "/ADHERENCE/TO/FANTASY",
        "/MULTIPLE/SHALLOW/WOUNDS",
        "/WHEN/YOU/LEAST/EXPECT/IT",
        "/GOOD/VEHICLE",
        "/LETS/ROCK",
        "/DANCE",
        "/BEND/BACK",
        "/LEO/NO/R000/LEO/NO",
        "/HAPPY/GENERATION",
        "/PAWNS/WILL/BE/EXPENDABLE",
        "/WHITE/LODGE",
        "/WHAT/A/WONDERFUL/WORLD",
        "/SMOKED/CHEESE/PIG",
        "/WHOLE/DAMN/TOWN",
        "/WOOD/TICK",
        "/FISH/IN/THE/PERCOLATOR",
        "/FULL/OF/SECRETS",
        "/WOODEN/SHOE",
        "/ONE/LEG/AT/A/TIME",
        "/WHOLE/DAMN/TOWN",
        "/LET/A/SMILE/BE/YOUR/UMBRELLA",
        "/MAIRZY",
        "/POOR/CHET"
};

#define QUOTECOUNT (sizeof(quotes) / sizeof(int))

const char *nums[] = {                          /* viva INTERCAL */

        "/OH", "/ONE", "/TWO", "/THREE", "/FOUR", "/FIVE", "/SIX", "/SEVEN",
        "/EIGHT", "/NINER"
};

int pindex(char c) {            /* Written because I was having problems
        char *s = PUNCT;                with strchr() and subtraction and
        while (*s)                      getting negative numbers on some
                if (c == *s++)          systems.                          */
                        return c;
        return -1;
}

void Printnum(char c, int n) {
        fprintf(stdout, "/%c%03o", c, n);
}

char *cutspace(char *c) {
        while ((*c == ' ') || (*c == '\t')) c++;
        return c;
}

void qstatic(void) {
        int i;

        i = random() % QUOTECOUNT;
        fprintf(stdout, quotes[i]);
}

void sstatic(void) {
        int i;

        i = random() % MESSINESS;
        while (i-- > 0)
                Printnum(random() % 26 + 'A', random() % MAXNUM);
        if (random() % PROBABILITY) return;
        qstatic();
        sstatic();
}

void number(int n) {                    /* viva INTERCAL again */

        if (n == 0) {
                fprintf(stdout, (random() % 2) ? "/ZERO" : "/OH");
                return;
        } else if (n == 9) {
                fprintf(stdout, (random() % 2) ? "/NINE" : "/NINER");
                return;
        }
        fprintf(stdout, nums[n]);
}

char *process(char *c) {
        int d;
        static int nline = 0;

        if (*c == '\n') {
                if (nline) sstatic();
                fprintf(stdout, "/C000");
                if (!(random() % PROBABILITY)) {
                        qstatic();
                        fprintf(stdout, "/C000");
                }
                nline = 1;
                return ++c;
        }

        nline = 0;
        if (isdigit(*c)) {
                number(*c - '0');
                return ++c;
        }
        if (isalpha(*c)) {
                fputc('/', stdout);
                while (isalpha(*c))
                        fputc(isupper(*c) ? *c++ : toupper(*c++), stdout);
                return c;
        }

        if (random() % 2) return ++c;       /* Don't copy 100% of punctuation,
                                                because it starts to get
                                                messy if you do.            */

        d = pindex(*c);
        if (d == -1) fprintf(stdout, "/C000");
                else Printnum('C', d);
        return ++c;
}

void main(int argc, char *argv[]) {
        char *s, *t = (char *)malloc(BUFSIZ);

        srandom(time(0));
        if (argc > 1) {
                fprintf(stdout, *(argv[1] + 1) == 'v' ? VERSION : USAGE);
                exit(0);
        }
        sstatic();
        while (fgets((s = t), BUFSIZ - 1, stdin) != NULL)
                while (*s) s = process(cutspace(s));
        sstatic();
        fprintf(stdout, "\n");
}

The following program may be of vast interest to many of you out there.
It was written by me.  It is the second version, the eagerly-awaited
re-release, of the Owlspeak program everyone was so extatic about!

It is a filter program, much like the rather infamous 'jive'.

  How to make the program:
  -----------------------

Save this article to disk, and then delete all of the lines up to (and
including) the "CUT HERE" line.  Then you need to compile it.  For the
examples below, the filename is "owlspeak.c".

If you are using the Nunez C Compiler, simply enter the command line:

Phillip [17]:  philcc -cool owlspeak.c -o owlspeak

If you are using something like gcc, you should type something like:

  gcc owlspeak.c -o owlspeak -O -Dphillip

But if you don't compile it with philcc, it won't be as good.  And in any
case, you need a compiler able to grok ANSI C.

Run the program by piping operations through it.  For example, to read
the message of the day, use "cat /etc/motd | owlspeak".

Have some fun.  Pipe your friend's .forward through owlspeak.  Rlogin to
your favorite machine through owlspeak.  The possibilities are endless.

Send all bug reports, comments, and suggestions to phillip@soda.berkeley.edu.

---------- CUT HERE ---------
/* Owlspeak, by Phillip "Edward" Nunez (phillip@soda.berkeley.edu) */

static char *VERSION = "/OWLSPEAK/VERSION/V002/PHILLIP/PHILLIP/PHILLIP\n";

                          /* Phillip in the above refers to phillip@soda,
                             Phillip "Edward" Nunez.                      */

#include <stdio.h>
#include <string.h>
#include <ctype.h>
#include <time.h>

#ifdef X11
  #include <X11/X.h>
#endif                          /* So I can post this to comp.sources.x */

#define USAGE "/USAGE/U000/CAT/FILE/PIPE/OWLSPEAK/OPTION/V/OPTIONAL\n"
#define PUNCT "@#$%^&*()_+|~-=\\`{}[]:\";'<>?,./"
#define MESSINESS 6
#define MAXNUM 01000                    /* In octal, of course */

#define PROBABILITY 9                   /* Chances are 1 in PROBABILITY
                                           (decimal) that a strange message
                                           will appear per random slashed
                                           octal number generated and per
                                           line of text.          */

/*  You might want to nazi the source code since you don't want stupid
        users to know everything that the program might do to their
        messages unless they run it a lot.                              */

char *quotes[] = {
        "/THE/OWLS/ARE/NOT/WHAT/THEY/SEEM",
        "/COOPER/COOPER/COOPER",
        "/DAMN/GOOD/COFFEE",
        "/I/LIKE/WHALES",
        "//APPETITE//SATISFACTION/",
        "/CIRCLE/OF/GOLD",
        "/HUMAN/HOST",
        "/WILL/NOT/BE/WRONG",
        "/SMILING/BAG",
        "/DEATH/BAG",
        "/ANOTHER/PLACE",
        "/THE/BIRDS/SING/A/PRETTY/SONG",
        "/ALWAYS/MUSIC/IN/THE/AIR",
        "/THROUGH/THE/DARKNESS/OF/FUTURE/PAST",
        "/FIRE/WALK/WITH/ME",
        "/WORK/RELATED",
        "/MILK/WILL/GET/COLD/ON/YOU",
        "/HEARD/ABOUT/YOU",
        "/ADHERENCE/TO/FANTASY",
        "/MULTIPLE/SHALLOW/WOUNDS",
        "/WHEN/YOU/LEAST/EXPECT/IT",
        "/GOOD/VEHICLE",
        "/LETS/ROCK",
        "/DANCE",
        "/BEND/BACK",
        "/LEO/NO/R000/LEO/NO",
        "/HAPPY/GENERATION",
        "/PAWNS/WILL/BE/EXPENDABLE",
        "/WHITE/LODGE",
        "/WHAT/A/WONDERFUL/WORLD",
        "/SMOKED/CHEESE/PIG",
        "/WHOLE/DAMN/TOWN",
        "/WOOD/TICK",
        "/FISH/IN/THE/PERCOLATOR",
        "/FULL/OF/SECRETS",
        "/WOODEN/SHOE",
        "/ONE/LEG/AT/A/TIME",
        "/WHOLE/DAMN/TOWN",
        "/LET/A/SMILE/BE/YOUR/UMBRELLA",
        "/MAIRZY",
        "/POOR/CHET"
};

#define QUOTECOUNT (sizeof(quotes) / sizeof(int))

const char *nums[] = {                          /* viva INTERCAL */

        "/OH", "/ONE", "/TWO", "/THREE", "/FOUR", "/FIVE", "/SIX", "/SEVEN",
        "/EIGHT", "/NINER"
};

int pindex(char c) {            /* Written because I was having problems
        char *s = PUNCT;                with strchr() and subtraction and
        while (*s)                      getting negative numbers on some
                if (c == *s++)          systems.                          */
                        return c;
        return -1;
}

void Printnum(char c, int n) {
        fprintf(stdout, "/%c%03o", c, n);
}

char *cutspace(char *c) {
        while ((*c == ' ') || (*c == '\t')) c++;
        return c;
}

void qstatic(void) {
        int i;

        i = random() % QUOTECOUNT;
        fprintf(stdout, quotes[i]);
}

void sstatic(void) {
        int i;

        i = random() % MESSINESS;
        while (i-- > 0)
                Printnum(random() % 26 + 'A', random() % MAXNUM);
        if (random() % PROBABILITY) return;
        qstatic();
        sstatic();
}

void number(int n) {                    /* viva INTERCAL again */

        if (n == 0) {
                fprintf(stdout, (random() % 2) ? "/ZERO" : "/OH");
                return;
        } else if (n == 9) {
                fprintf(stdout, (random() % 2) ? "/NINE" : "/NINER");
                return;
        }
        fprintf(stdout, nums[n]);
}

char *process(char *c) {
        int d;
        static int nline = 0;

        if (*c == '\n') {
                if (nline) sstatic();
                fprintf(stdout, "/C000");
                if (!(random() % PROBABILITY)) {
                        qstatic();
                        fprintf(stdout, "/C000");
                }
                nline = 1;
                return ++c;
        }

        nline = 0;
        if (isdigit(*c)) {
                number(*c - '0');
                return ++c;
        }
        if (isalpha(*c)) {
                fputc('/', stdout);
                while (isalpha(*c))
                        fputc(isupper(*c) ? *c++ : toupper(*c++), stdout);
                return c;
        }

        if (random() % 2) return ++c;       /* Don't copy 100% of punctuation,
                                                because it starts to get
                                                messy if you do.            */

        d = pindex(*c);
        if (d == -1) fprintf(stdout, "/C000");
                else Printnum('C', d);
        return ++c;
}

void main(int argc, char *argv[]) {
        char *s, *t = (char *)malloc(BUFSIZ);

        srandom(time(0));
        if (argc > 1) {
                fprintf(stdout, *(argv[1] + 1) == 'v' ? VERSION : USAGE);
                exit(0);
        }
        sstatic();
        while (fgets((s = t), BUFSIZ - 1, stdin) != NULL)
                while (*s) s = process(cutspace(s));
        sstatic();
        fprintf(stdout, "\n");
}

In article <91015.132110ACPS7035@Ryerson.CA>, ACPS7035@Ryerson.CA (Sean Edward Blenkhorn) writes...

} The ideas that a group of friends and I came up with is that Diane is the
} woman that Cooper fell in love with and he was suppose to protect. When
} she was killed he snapped and goes around with the pocket recorder talking
} to Diane.

I take it that you and your friends have not heard that Carol Lynley is
supposed to appear in later episodes as Diane -- or, as it's been said,
parts of Lynley will appear as parts of Diane.

-- "My public will kill me for dying at a time like this." --- jayembee (Jerry Boyajian, DEC, "The Mill", Maynard, MA) UUCP: ...!decwrl!ruby.enet.dec.com!boyajian ARPA: boyajian%ruby.DEC@DECWRL.DEC.COM

In article <91016.155348ADMN8647@Ryerson.CA>, ADMN8647@Ryerson.CA (Linda Birmingham) writes...

} Does anyone remember exactly what he said when he was shot something
} about making love to a certain woman?

He said, "I would like to make love to a beautiful woman." That's it. We,
of course, don't know what his parameters are for beauty, though we can at
least infer from his comments that Josie, Sid, and Audrey all fall within
those parameters.

-- "My public will kill me for dying at a time like this." --- jayembee (Jerry Boyajian, DEC, "The Mill", Maynard, MA) UUCP: ...!decwrl!ruby.enet.dec.com!boyajian ARPA: boyajian%ruby.DEC@DECWRL.DEC.COM

In article <JIMH.91Jan17145143@hpmclc.mcm.hp.com>, jimh@hpmclc.mcm.hp.com (Jim Harritt) writes...

} Is it just Portland, or will the 1-19 TP episode be pre-empted everywhere
} for the Cerebral Palsy Telethon?

It's scheduled to air in Boston (TP, that is, not the telethon), but odds
are probably good that it'll be pre-empted by coverage of that tete-a-tete
on the other side of the planet.

-- "My public will kill me for dying at a time like this." --- jayembee (Jerry Boyajian, DEC, "The Mill", Maynard, MA) UUCP: ...!decwrl!ruby.enet.dec.com!boyajian ARPA: boyajian%ruby.DEC@DECWRL.DEC.COM

In article <FRANCIS.91Jan18110630@daisy.uchicago.edu> francis@uchicago.edu (Francis Stracke) writes:
> >In article </X234/B491/THE/OWLS/ARE/NOT/WHAT/THEY/SEEM/N005/C001@soda> phillip@soda.berkeley.edu (Phillip "Edward" Nunez) writes:

We urge everyone in affected newsgroups to ignore phillip.  He is not quite
BIFF, but along the same lines.  

We ignore him if possible.  So ought you.

-george william herbert
gwh@soda  usenet@soda by act of god  i'm going to regret having posted this. 
i usually do.

Someone recently posted a summary of 2012 and I incorporated it into
my timeline. Thanks to you whoever you are (lost your address)!
I won't always be able to post new episodes right after they're aired;
the next posting might be in a few days or weeks.
As usual, please send corrections and transcriptions to me at enomura@ucsd.edu

ed

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

17 Mar Friday   [Episode 2012 - 1/12/90
                 Written by Harley Peyton and Robert Engles
 Directed by Caleb Deschanel]

Morning
  -- Bobby tries again to blackmail Ben, who's acting too weird for it to
     take. B: "You know what you need in this life? Balance, distance,
     symmetry." He's stacked his furniture. Eventually he hires Bobby to spy 
     on Hank; Bobby is thrilled.
  -- Cooper is discussing houses with a real estate agent (Irene).  A coin
     flip leads him to like Dead Dog Farm, an estate with a mysterious past
     where no one stays for long.
  -- Andy, Dick and Lucy visit with Nickie's case worker.  Nickie is an orphan
     who has been through many foster homes, and is the victim of "persistent
     random misfortune." Harry breaks up the meeting calling Andy to an
     emergency at the Great Northern.
  -- Harry, Doc Hayward and Andy investigate Dougie Milford, dead in his hotel
     bed.  Dwayne comes in and grieves, accusing the wife of murder by
     sex.  Andy doesn't cry.  "My Secret Life" by Chris Gerrity is found
     on the bed. 
  -- In the hallway, Hawk is talking/flirting with the widow. H: "When
     something big goes down, I'm the man."

10:10 (clock on wall)
  -- Nadine has joined the wrestling team and takes district champion Mike in
     one fall while asking him out.
  -- Mike complains to Donna about Nadine.
  -- James meets Malcolm Sloan - Evelyn Marsh's brother, Jeffrey Marsh's
     driver.  He says Marsh abuses Evelyn. Once a fortnight she breaks one
     of his things.
  -- At Dead Dog Farm, Cooper notices some tire tracks: "A Jeep, a four-
     wheeler and a luxury sedan." In the house he deduces a meeting took
     place in the past few hours. He finds baby laxative and cocaine dust.
  -- Dick fixes a flat (reading the instructions) while Nicky is irritating.
     While Nicky is not touching the car and facing the other way, the car
     falls off the jack.  Nicky panics and runs to hug Dick (who is unhurt).

Day
  -- Cooper comes to tell Harry about Dead Dog Farm, but instead visits
     with Air Force Colonel Reilly investigating Major Briggs.  Briggs is a
     great pilot.  "The owls are not what they seem" was broadcast from
     the woods, not deep space -- maybe from the White Lodge ("That's
     classified"). Cooper mentions seeing an owl before Briggs disappeared.
  -- James and Evelyn flirt and kiss.  James encourages her to leave her
     husband but she refuses.  When Jeffrey comes home she runs to greet him.
  -- Bobby, returning to Ben's office with photos, sees Audrey who flirts
     with him but doesn't kiss him.  Audrey goes to her secret listening place.
  -- Ben, who is working on a civil war model ("Gettysburg, day 1"), accepts
     the photos from Bobby and gives him a raise. Audrey eavesdrops.
  -- Pete and Catherine enjoy a romantic meal, served by Josie in a maid
     outfit.  Pete is bothered by Catherine's treatment of Josie, but is having
     too much fun to make an issue of it.
  -- Cooper brings Diane up to date.  Cooper did in fact respond to Earle's
     chess opening by publishing his response, "P-Q4", in the classifieds.
     Audrey knocks and offers Cooper Bobby's photos she has just stolen from
     her father's office.  Cooper identifies them as Hank, Ernie, Jean Renault
     and the mountie, meeting at Dead Dog Farm.  Denise comes in, and Audrey
     Audrey kisses Cooper on her way out.  Cooper briefs Denise.
     D: I may wear a dress but I still put on my panties one leg at a time,
        if you know what I mean.
     Cooper: Not really...

Night
  -- At the RR, Ed looks depressed, prompting Norma to suggest they can still
     be friends and to take his hand, all this secretly witnessed by Hank,
     sporting a 3:4 domino.
  -- Dick tells Andy he thinks Nicky is the devil.
  -- In Harry's office, Dwayne continues to accuse Judy of murder.  Doc says
     it was a natural heart attack.
  -- In the hallway, all the men watch Judy being escorted to a room. They
     begin collectively reciting Shakespeare.
  -- Lucy tries to call the sheriff to the phone, but gets no response.  She
     eventually finds all the men literally spellbound by Judy telling stories.
  -- Dennis visits Ernie at the RR. At the Great Northern, Cooper and Dennis
     interrogate Ernie.  They apparently want to let him off, using him to
     catch the big guys.  Dennis will pose as a buyer from Seattle and Ernie
     will arrange for a deal between Renault and Dennis.
  -- James hears Evelyn and Jeffrey fighting.  Malcolm tells James the first
     beating was four years ago. He swears to kill Jeffrey.
  -- Bobby goes home to find his mother sitting in the dark grieving over the
     Major's disappearance.  She flips on an owl lamp and Bobby tells his
     mother about the Major's vision. Suddenly the lights go out and the major
     materializes in the house, wearing a vintage pilot's outfit (leather
     jacket and goggles) and asking how long he's been gone.
     Betty: Is everything all right?
     Garland: Not exactly...
-- "Are you suggesting there is something... irregular at work here?" Edwin Nomura enomura@sdcc13.ucsd.edu